Someday...

(In reference to Reuben's practice of naming sandwiches after Broadway stars..."The Eddie Cantor Chicken Club," etc. The artist is Leonard Dove.)

The Yo-Yo - Helen Kane - Poop Connection

If you've been reading this blog today, you've been wondering what yo-yos have to do with feces. I myself wasn't aware of any connection but a November 23, 1929 advertisement from Reubens gives us this, a note handwritten by Helen Kane.


I mentioned this morning that one of the 1929 yo-yo tricks was the "Boop-a-doop," obviously derived from the Helen Kane song "I Wanna Be Loved By You." Then, later in the day, I told three stories about poop. Now I give you a note written by Helen Kane in which she says

I wanna be loved by you --
Poop Popp Poop Poop

There you go! I don't just write about random things! It's all connected, just sometimes you have to wait a bit!

PS: I find it hilarious to think of Broadway star Helen Kane being so drunk at Reubens that she can't even remember the lyrics to her one hit song.

PPS: A long time ago I posted some of the choicest Reubens advertisements. Remember? They would spy on their celebrity guests, and then write about what they ordered and what terrible pigs they were. As of 1929 the new Reubens schtick is to publish celebrity quotes, and then somewhat more discreetly call them pigs.

Seen at Reuben's: Helen Kane

Because I get a strange enjoyment out of these crazy "celebrity pig-out gossip" stories, and I hope you do too:

HELEN KANE can't blame our A. M. devotees one little bit for singing "We wanna be fed by you, just you and nobody else but you". She brought it on herself! And between great hungry mouthfuls of a particularly luscious Reuben's Hot Turkey Sandwich rubily bespangled with Cranberry Jelly, this town's newest Jazz Diva enthusiastically endorsed the parody in her best "Boop-boop-a-doop" manner. And for that matter so does everybody else!

So let's get this straight. Kane walks into Reuben's and orders her food, and while she's eating it a bunch of radio fans sing a weird, food-centric parody of Kane's biggest hit. Supposedly Kane appreciates this and does her trademark "boop-boop-a-doop" thing.

These people were mental.

Reuben's Calls Out Frances Williams

Move over Evelyn, Frances is the next target in the Reuben's "YOU HAVE NO PRIVACY, CELEBRITY!" ad campaign.

Somehow we never quite associate the electrifying FRANCES WILLIAMS with such grossly material things as buying merchandise--but then, when it comes to Holiday shopping--(and when we say shopping we're speaking of Reuben's now!)-- we all meet on common ground. We'd like to delve deeply into MISS WILLIAMS' rapturous reactions to our precious presentation of fascinating feminine fripperies...the ducky Atomizers, the the snooty Boudoir Lamps, the fussiest of fussy Sweetmeat Boxes...mmmm! don't we wish we had the space to say more!

As if sharing a stage with The Marx Brothers wasn't harrowing enough, now all of Frances' friends knew exactly where she bought that ducky Atomizer.

PS: Just in case you were wondering, an "Atomizer" didn't blow things up, it just sprayed perfume around.

Reuben's Strikes Again

I can't help imagining Evelyn Herbert opening The New Yorker on December 1, 1928, and shouting "Those NOSY STINKING BASTARDS!"

Yes, the folks at Reuben's restaurant have done it again. I think this is my favourite so far.

Masses of brightly burnished gold floated gracefully through our door the other November eve. A scientific phenomenon? Well...that's hardly the right appellation for the glowing, golden voiced EVELYN HERBERT, is it now? And though our heart was elsewhere, we could not help but notice, later, that not one delicious morsel of Reuben's priceless Chicken Madiola was escaping Miss Herbert's fork!

Seen at Reuben's

For a few weeks I've been coming across these disturbing 1928 New Yorker advertisements for Reuben's Restaurant and Delicatessen. They were pretty laid back at first, but now they've exploding into a voyeuristic combination of celebrity-taunting and food fetishism. I quote:

Of course you didn't hear us chuckle, Mr. DUDLEY FIELD MALONE, but odds bodkins, our sense of humor just won't down when we see a legal luminary engaged in victorious debate with a fragrant, savory Reuben's hot Turkey Sandwich! No schoolboy at the jam pot (again) ever displayed more earnest, unqualified appreciation. The pleasure was ours as well as yours, Mr. Malone?

If *I* went someplace for dinner, and then the next day read an advertisement that said "Muffy St. Bernard came into our restaurant and ATE LIKE A CRAZY PIG!" I don't think I'd come back. But I guess any publicity is good publicity...

Here's another:

When a wit once asked us, mock-seriously, "Is this table large enough for a Reuben's apple pancake?" did we rush pell mell to the kitchen to reduce portions? No, we merely smiled smugly--for we knew that GEORGE WHITE would happen along shortly and--demon for details that he is--would surely detect the difference in his pet dish, inimitable spicy deliciousness or no. When you did arrive, Mr. White--did order--did demolish one of our famous over-stuffed apple pancakes--we knew there was little the matter with our blooming policy after all. Reassurance is a great tonic!

Odds bodkins, what a pancake that must have been!