Friday, January 04, 2008

Pie in the Pundit

I am fascinated by the slow accumulation of hits, comments, links, and subscriptions that my videos are pulling in. I wonder what I am doing that is "intriguing," what people EXPECT me to be doing, and what I might do to actually turn them off.

When I noticed that some of my subscribers were interested in pieing -- no doubt in a fetishy way -- I got even more curious: what do they like about pieing, and what makes a good "pieing video" for them?

I decided to make a pieing video in my own way, without ever having watched any of the OTHER videos. Over the holidays I built up the idea in my head, and then at 3am on New Year's Day I decided the time was right; also I had to do it soon or the pie would go bad.



Off the top of my head I can say that it was a cold, wet, and slimy experience, and that lemon meringue doesn't stick to CoverFX E20 cream foundation. I also think it would have been more fun to have the pie THROWN at me -- in the true spirit of a vaudeville pastry-attack -- but there was nobody else around so it had to be me.

I'm most interested to find out if "pie in the face" fans HATE the video. They probably want to see gorgeous, scantily-dressed, model-perfect women getting surprised by the approaching pie, not a scruffy, post-bar drag queen, pontificating without eyelashes and wearing a very old T-shirt.

So for the next few weeks I'll be eagerly watching the comments and anticipating the "hate comments" that I have managed to totally avoid so far. Are people ready for a gentler, smarter, uglier "pie in the face" video? We'll see, but I doubt it!

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

you lead a charmed existance

Adam Thornton said...

By so far avoiding the YouTube nasty comment avalanche? I'm sure you're right...I keep on expecting it.

Anonymous said...

more pie, less pontification

whipped cream, not lemon merangue

Adam Thornton said...

I can't help myself...I HAVE to pontificate. :)

Anonymous said...

Pieholer said: 'whipped cream, not lemon meringue.'

I can't believe someone named pieholer beat me to my line.

VanillaJ said...

Is pieing without the pontification a form of pornography? You know: no plot, all action.

Adam Thornton said...

As usual, all the good names are taken!

You'll have to settle for "pieholer69."

Adam Thornton said...

I look forward to the day when all pieing videos contain pontification, because pontification SHOULD be porn.

Anonymous said...

pontification has no place in pron, unless words get you off, which makes the nightly news dirty, dirty, dirty. I knew Dan Rather was a pervert!

Anonymous said...

Dan Rather turns ME on, with a pie!

Anonymous said...

dan rather, muffy and a pie. sounds like the plot to a WB sitcom

tanzi said...

I loved the fake-out countdown on "three" not "five"!
You're hard core by smashing it in your face twice to make it messier--nice to see ya giving your audience what they want.

Hey--do you remember how we were thought to be all smart and creative and stuff in grade 8 and were sent to "enrichment"? (Or is that just what they told us it was...) We made a film inspired by the tv show "V" and were going to pretend to eat the class hamster but forgot to film that part...Maybe time for a reenactment???

Adam Thornton said...

Where the heck was that memory buried?!?

I had a vague recollection of grade 8 enrichment (didn't we meet in a little side-room of the library, partitioned from the rest of the library by a folding screen, with a big table down the middle?)

But I'd totally forgotten "V." That wasn't my idea, am I right that it was Andrew McKewen's plan?

And did we EVER film anything? I draw a complete blank.

I can't help thinking that the people who oversee enrichment programs must be long-suffering indeed.

Anonymous said...

I wonder whatever happened to Andrew Mac, anyhow?

Pieholer69, signing off.

tanzi said...

Andrew only went to Grandview with us. I remember 'cause I was sad that the boy who stole my nailpolish and ate my chapstick was moving away. :(

Adam Thornton said...

He moved away? That's what happened?

I do remember that in Grade 6 he started a strange sort of "eat exciting new foods" club. Somebody brought in those puffy marshmallow-chocolate cookies -- maybe you, Scott? -- but one of them had been sitting on his mother's chopping block for some reason, and when I ate it it tasted like marshmallow, chocolate, and onions.

Terrible!

ANDREW STOLE YOUR NAIL POLISH AND ATE YOUR CHAPSTICK? Wait...

tanzi said...

HA! Maybe you'll run into him at a show! Yeah--he loved to wear nailpolish. I lent him my chapstick once then noticed the tooth marks in it when he gave it back. It was bubble gum flavoured...
I kinda remember that weird food thing. Man I loved him!

Adam Thornton said...

I haven't thought about him for AGES, and I had no idea of his penchant for nail polish and chapstick!

His "weird food" club had a bizarre name that is just on the tip of my tongue. It was "The [Something] Club," and the missing word implied extravagance without actually having anything to do with food. Something like "The Debonaire Club," but that wasn't it.

I remember at the time thinking that the name didn't make any sense, but maybe Andrew was smarter than I thought, because the names of such clubs usually DON'T relate directly to their mandate...