Weighing In & Getting Kicked Out

My hostessing never went further than handing out cheese and Ritz crackers at my parent's parties. But I've always wanted to be the perfect hostess, and I have always fantastized about an actual JOB as a hostess. I think such a job would be wonderful because I'd get to meet lots of strangers without needing to actually spend much time with any of them.

To improve my party skills I bought Betty White's "Teen-Age Dance Book" (1952). Besides teaching you how to cha-cha-cha, it also provides tips for dressing, dating, and party organization.

There are far too many gems in the book for me to present them all at once, but here's my personal favourite: Betty White rhetorically asks "Wouldn't you like to try some new ideas for admission to a Dance instead of the usual 'Tickets please at the door'?" One of her ideas is sure to catch on in any social group...it's called "Weighing In."

If you can borrow the school scale, you can have fun weighing your guests upon their arrival at the Dance. Those weighing above a specified number of pounds agreed upon by the Committee could be charged for the price of admission. Guests whose weight falls below that number could be admitted free. Or just the opposite.

Because EVERYBODY wants to be publically weighed before a dance.

Betty and I can't turn you into the perfect Dance guest overnight, but I can leave you with her list of strict prohibitions, which she entitles "NEVER, NEVER, NEVER."

• Chew gum at a dance.
• Slouch while sitting or sprawl legs.
• Remain seated while being presented to an older person.
• Cross a dance floor. (Go round the outside.)
• Leave a girl standing on the floor.
• Create a scene (in emergency request the assistance of a host, hostess, or chaperone).
• Indulge in "horseplay," sliding, or running.
• Be inattentive or unco-operative while the hostess runs a mixer.
• Slight one person in order to dance with another.
• Serve yourself with refreshments before looking out for others.
• "Court" or indulge in awkward "holds" while on the floor.
• Become a dance exhibitionist.
• Criticize your partner's dancing.
• Doodle on the furniture or play with decorations.
• Join the dance without acknowledging hostess.